The Goodness Jar

I realize that I haven't written a post for years. I am trying to make note of little day to day things in our lives more and have been doing really well at taking pictures of little moments. I have carpal tunnel syndrome from being swollen and pregnant with Wiebe Spawn #2 and so am not able to write much in my journal before my hands go numb. So I  thought that posting to my blog could replace my journal for the time being.

I had the most wonderful gift given to me the other day. A dear friend of mine came over and gave me a pedicure for my birthday! It was a heaven-sent blessing for my swollen pregnant feet, that I can't reach myself. SHE EVEN BROUGHT ME SOME BROWNIES! Seriously, wonderful friends I have.

 

Aren't they pretty?

We visited and had a wonderful time... but the best gift she gave me was unintentional. In our discussion came the topic of my seriously full of disrespect and attitude, 3 year-old. (I hope other mom's out there can relate) This lovely lady is a school teacher of young kids and told me about a Party Jar that she has for her students. Anytime she notices one of them doing something good she gives them a bead to put in the jar. Once the jar is full then the whole class gets to pick a theme party to have as a class.

This was exactly what I needed. I had been telling her that I felt like I had tried everything...

• Time outs
• Spanks
• Spanking his mouth when he spits at me
• Nice talks during positive times about being respectful
• Taking away toys and putting them in "Jail" for him to get out when he does something good.
• Throwing toys in the garbage
• Taking away TV privileges
• ...crayon privileges
• ... treat priveleges
• ... Gymnastics priveleges

I simply said, "I don't know what else to do... but I'm tired of feeling bullied by my 3 year old."

So she suggested a Goodness Jar. She said the Goodness Jar is ONLY positive. I still have to give punishment, where punishment is needed, but that is separate from the jar. Once it's full he gets to pick a special date with mommy or daddy, or both as a special gift for being so good.

So Saturday morning while listening to General Conference Adam and I decorated a Goodness Jar for him. It has made a huge difference in my life so far. He is so happy and excited when he gets to put in some rocks (I think I'm going to upgrade to marbles or large wooden beads. The rocks will take WAY TOO LONG to fill the jar) and the thing that I've noticed the most is that I stay focused on his positive moments throughout the day; instead of being upset about all the negative. Who knew that the Goodness Jar was good for mommies too?

When I ask Adam what special day he's going to pick when his Goodness Jar is full he says "Grouse Hunting with Daddy!!!" Awesome. This has changed my life. It has changed my perspective and I now choose to focus on the positive in our days instead of the negatives.

 

I thought about decorating it myself. But this is so much better

 

Smiles and Hugs, Bundle of Joy.